1st LAC Review

Raina slept all the way through the first LAC review meeting this afternoon. It made us both smile; at the end of the meeting we both laughed at how they took our word for it that she was in the house (she could have been out partying!) Our link SW arrived first and then Raina's SW and the Independent Chair (IC) arrived shortly afterwards. The IC led the meeting which lasted around 45 minutes. We reviewed the introductions and initial weeks of placement. We updated everyone on Raina's sleeping patterns; toilet routine; health issues; education and the types of activities we had been doing together. We also discussed contact with the Foster Family. Given how difficult Raina found the last telephone conversation, the IC suggested we leave it a while before dong it again. We will just continue to stay in touch with the Foster family ourselves (updating on progress etc) and carry on talking to Raina about them when she wants to. We also discussed contact with the birth parents. This is quite complex and we will probably meet the birth parents (without Raina) on our own within the next 3 months. After this we will plan for direct contact for Raina (timing being key). All three SW's strongly advised that this happens after the Adoption Order has been completed and we have the legal parental responsibility. They advise that this is better for us, the birth parents and ultimately for the children involved to do it this way. We can apply for the Adoption Order after 10 weeks of placement. The placement order granted by the court only stated annual letter-box contact, but we have always been open to direct contact. We want Raina to know where she 'comes from' and believe that direct contact is best for her in the short, medium and long-term however hard it will be for her (and us). Direct contact means that Raina can grow up hopefully without needing to fantasise about her birth parents; with answers to some of the questions she has. Not having opportunities for this is something that can leave some adopted children feeling isolated, depressed and ultimately distanced from their adoptive parents. Contact is likely to be a big mountain for us to climb; but we are not ready to start climbing it yet and neither is Raina, as it's only been two weeks!!! The next LAC Review is in 12 weeks. The next fortnight we have weekly visits from a SW and then after that monthly visits. In the meantime I have got a further 6 days off work and the next phase of our lives will be getting into the routine of me going to work and Raina and Momma having their days together. I'm not looking forward to going back to work, I'm really going to miss Raina but I know that it'll be good for the three of us to get into some semblance of 'normal' life. X x x