Sorry for not having blogged for a while, life has taken over and we thought we'd 'store up' the updates for a suitable moment. This seemed to be that suitable moment ; the 7 month mark of being a forever family and since our daughter came home with us. It's also that significant time of year; Christmas. This time last year, our PAR was almost done (or so we thought) and Approval was going to be early in the New Year. Then it suddenly seemed to be slowing down again.....but that was the year that was. You can read all about that time here....
http://timeofrlives.blogspot.co.uk/2012/01/can-you-be-too-honest-in-home.html#links
Raina is here; she is here for our first Christmas and nothing else really matters now.
Since our last posting we have met Raina's Birth Parents. This was a massively emotional meeting and we both felt the pressure beforehand building up. When the day came, we were both extremely nervous. It was well coordinated and planned; we had exchanged questions prior to meeting through our own Social Workers. We talked for an hour and I've never known both ours and Raina's Social Workers be so quiet in all this time! It was emotional; everyone shed some tears but overall it was useful, productive and positive for us and for Raina. We closed the meeting by taking photos of us all together and parted with hugs. The account of the content of this meeting will remain between us until we can share it with Raina when she is old enough.
It left us feeling like we understood Raina better. We have seen the BP's in photos but seeing them in person presented a completely new dynamic. Recognising the facial similarities and likenesses with personalities was wonderful. Raina looks so much like both her BP's. Seeing where she 'came from' made us both feel like we were connected to Raina in a deeper way. In the only way they could; her Birth Parents told us that they approved of us; that it was okay for us to love her and call her our 'daughter'. They clearly love her so deeply and have been at the lowest points since Raina went into Care and a plan for Adoption was made for her. I can only hope that meeting us might have helped them to find a slightly more positive space to think about Raina's adoption. We continue to keep them in our thoughts and in our conversations with Raina, in a way in which she can understand.
Last week we had our Civil Partnership. It was a wonderful day; spent amongst our families and friends. It was the perfect ending to the year and the icing on the cake for 2012. We have also completed the Adoption Application and will be sending this off soon. 2013 will be another big year....that's already on the cards!
Happy Christmas!!!
Ruth and Hannah
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