First conversation with the Foster Carer

We have just finished our first conversation with our potential 'daughter to be's' Foster Carer! From here on in we shall refer to her as 'Raina'.

We had prepared a list of questions on paper in advance to help us in case we got caught up in the moment.  We were both quite nervous but after 30 seconds on the phone we realised we needn't feel any nerves; she is clearly a lovely woman and has done such a great job over the last year and we found ourselves chatting away from the start like we had known each other for ages! As soon as she started to describe Raina she used words like "friendly, bubbly and happy" and suddenly it all started to feel real.  This woman was describing a little child who at that point was asleep in her home and is our potential daughter. 

We talked for about 45 minutes as she recalled lots of funny and cute stories and described some amusing personality traits, saying that Raina is a "real character".  She described her as a really funny child, full of affection for the Foster Carer and her wider family and liked by everyone who meets her.  

She reassured us by saying that she can't foresee any big problems with the placement, except possibly disturbed sleep when Raina moves in, but that is something we are expecting to happen.  She helpfully recounted lots of practical tips for managing behaviour and situations and we have a good idea of the routines she is used to. It is great that the Foster Carer is so willing to share her experiences to help us. 

She said that Raina likes to have a bath, brush her teeth and wash her hands!   She loves Mr Tumble (this is going to be a whole new world for us!) and chart music. If there is a party; she is centre stage of the dance floor busting some moves! She eats everything (curry, roast, pasta, vegetables and fruit and chocolate!)

The Foster Carer described how sad she herself will be when our little girl leaves her.  We get a sense that when Raina is gone there will be a 'hole' in the Foster Carers', and her wider families lives.  Thankfully, she sounds experienced in this and told us how Raina "really needs a family" and that securing permanence is her motivating force.  We told her that everything we have read or been told has said that the little one has thrived in her care and for that we are extremely grateful. 

So tonight we feel like we have taken a step closer to our child and know her a bit better after this wonderful conversation, with this wonderful woman.  We have been reassured by talking to her that the Foster Carer is going to work hard behind the scenes to try and make the placement a success.  She is 100% focused on Raina and ready for the introductions to start and for them to spend as much time apart; so Raina can begin to get to know us and vice-versa. She told us that we can call anytime to ask questions and said that once the little one is home to call her anytime of the day or night. 

Wow, we are both pooped so will have to sign off for now

Hannah & Ruth